Lonesome cowboy Nando
(performance from You can't do that on stage anymore, vol. 6)
 
Frank:
My name is Nando,
I'm a marine biologist.
All my friends,
they call me "Doh".
 
Ike & Mike:
Hi, Doh!
 
Frank:
All my family,
from someplace in this area,
And they complain if I talk about this horrible pizza
during the show.
 
All:
Come out here, to Californy,
Just to find me some pretty girls.
Ones I seen gets me so horny,
Ruby lips, 'n teeth like pearls.
 
Wanna love 'em all, wanna love 'em dearly.
Wanna a jellyfish, I'll even pay.
I'll buy 'em furs, I'll buy 'em pizza,
I know they like me, here's what I'll say:
 

Ike:
"Darling, I crazy go nuts when I hear this,
you know what I'm sayin'?"
 
Frank:
When I get off, I get plastered.
I swim till I fall on the jellyfish.
Then I find me some academic kind of illustrator,
I describe the little dangling utensils on this thing,
And tell him to draw it up
so it looks just like a brand new jellyfish.
 
Ike & Mike:
(trying to follow along, they sing some gibberish)
 
Frank:
"Take that! Take that!"
I fuss an' I cuss and I keep on swimmin',
Till my snorkel puffs up an' turns red.
I drool on my shorts,
I do some water sports,
Then I take the jellyfish back to my house
And stick it in the bed! "Sorta..."
 
Ike & Mike:
"Whaddya do?"
Stick it again in the bed!
 
Frank:
"That's right!
 
Ike & Mike:
Stick it again in the bed!
Stick it again in the bed!
Stick it again in the bed!
 
Opel, you hot little bitch!